Cleo's Dating Blog

Hi, My Name is Cleo and I am an Addict

Posted on: October 28, 2010

My addiction started in the 7th grade. It was a rush unlike any other. The increased heart rate, heightened senses, extreme attentiveness to the present moment… so exhilarating! I could not wait for the next dose. I was addicted. More please. Now.

I always thought of myself as a self-disciplined individual- I was not someone with an addictive personality. You could look up the word moderation in the dictionary and find a picture of my face- smiling, of course. Yet, never say never, could Cleo have found her vice?

Well, enough ambiguity… I was and am addicted to flirting.

Oh so innocent you think! Wrong. Flirting has gotten me into so much trouble (and so much blessing as well, hehe)! I did not realize until recently that I have a flirting problem. A friend brought to my attention that I am one of the most compulsive flirts he has ever seen. At first, I did not take this as a compliment because I am not ditsy, easy, or desperate- which are words I quickly associated with the phrase “compulsive flirt”.  I mean, I’m not even blonde. Yet, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that if I tried to stop flirting altogether, I would be denying a fun-loving,natural, and complimentary part of my personality.

Why do I find flirting so delicious? First of all, not only do I like how it makes me feel, but I like seeing how it affects the flirtee. I like seeing how a playful phrase, naughty look, deep eye contact, warm body language, or special attention can make the recipient’s eyes liven up, cheeks blush, mind race, and energy spike. It is amazing how such little things can affect another so much. Flirting has the potential to completely change the vibe of any situation.

I love a man that knows how to flirt. A man who knows how to casually sneak a wink in during conversation, uses lingering eye contact to let you know he’s interested, or gently touches your side while you’re walking. One of my favorite things is finding an excuse to whisper in your ear just to get his lips close to your face. Gets me every time.

My problem with flirting is that I generally do think it is innocent. Life is too short not to have fun. However, I realized one thing about men. Most men have egos. Huge, giant, every-woman-wants-me egos. So although I may be flirting just for the sake of having a good time, some men are instead carefully calculating how he can make the flirting into a reality.

But is he to blame? Well… no. Flirting does imply a certain degree of romantic/sexual interest. But please, do not try to pin me against a wall if all I’ve done is look you in the eyes and listen to what you are saying. Some call this “manners.”

Learning to read people, especially potential lovers, is very important in dating. Knowing when your innocent flirting may be misinterpreted is essential in avoiding awkward or even harmless situations. Also knowing when your flirting is undetectable or weak is important in evaluating your level of “game.”

The way I see it, flirting is the best way to initially judging how another feels about you. If your flirting attempts are not reciprocated you are either 1. Doing it wrong and need lessons from Cleo or 2. He (she) is not interested. The more you try past option 2, the more you look like an idiot.

As with most of my posts, the key to successful flirting is being self aware. Know when you are doing too much or doing too little. Know when flirting is appropriate (bar, grocery store, with significant other, etc) or is not appropriate (work, with not-single people, etc). Ironically my addiction to flirting is most effective in moderation- how ironic!

Cheers to moderation!

 

Muah,

Foxy Cleopatra

 

 

 

 

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