Cleo's Dating Blog

I Tiptoe

Posted on: February 16, 2011

I tiptoe.

Airy and light, I tiptoe.

Like a clumsy ballerina.

Curious to see everything, cautious of being seen.

-//-//-

I like tiptoeing.

I even like the word tiptoe.

Is it possible to tiptoe rudely? I think not.

-//-//-

Tiptoeing gives you options.

It is easier to change direction, change your mind, change your feelings.

It is easier to avoid mistakes, regret, heartbreak, and embarrassment.

Like floating with the wind,

You can disappear in a moment.

-//-//-

Tiptoeing is cute.

Children tiptoe,

people with a fun surprise tiptoe.

If you tiptoe, you have a mission.

-//-//-

Tiptoeing is better than skipping.

Skipping is calling for attention.

Tiptoeing is private, controlled, and safe.

What a relief it can be just to tiptoe.

-//-//-

But sometimes, I don’t feel like tiptoeing.

Sometimes, I feel like doing something different.

There are so many other options: run, jump, walk, cart-wheel.

Why do I always pick fall?

Going from tiptoe to fall is not logical.

Falling is not safe; falling almost guarantees pain.

Why do I always fall?

-//-//-

Sometimes I don’t even see it coming.

One moment I am tiptoeing,

the next I have fallen.

Fast, hard, and unstoppable.

Just falling and falling and falling.

So many times I fall.

I can’t even see the bottom but I choose to fall.

Why do I choose to fall?

-//-//-

Falling gives you scars.

Wounds that heal slowly.

Falling creates fear.

I hope this fear doesn’t affect my tiptoeing.

-//-//-

My only explanation is…

I just can’t help it.

I am intrigued by falling.

Something about falling seems worth it.

-//-//-

I know I will keep this cycle of tiptoeing and falling.

Over and over.

It makes me feel brave.

I just hope, one day,

when I am falling,

I do not hit the bottom.

And instead…

you catch me.

Thank you for reading,

Cleo

 

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