Why I Don’t Have Guy Friends

Posted by: cleo on: August 8, 2011

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• 6 Comments

I must be too charming to have guy friends. The platonic guy-girl relationship is something that I can not seem to balance correctly, and as a Libra, I need everything to be balanced.

It is easy for me to be friends with girls. Here is why:

1. We have a lot in common: men problems, shopping, yoga, make up, vodka cranberries, menstruation, fashion, dieting, chocolate, and the list goes on.

2. I am not a jealous girl (unless a guy is involved). I want (and require) all of my girl friends to be pretty, because being surrounded by beautiful people makes me feel beautiful.

3. The secret to a successful girl-girl friendship is this: a compliment goes a long way. I am not afraid to distribute compliments when I genuinely feel them. All girls want to feel pretty every day, it is very simple.

Also, I am a good listener. This means having solid eye contact, giving empathy, contributing to the conversation, and helping to solve problems when necessary.

These points present some problems when applied to a girl-guy friendship, at least for me.

1. We do not have a lot in common. I do not follow sports center, watch porn, drink beer, or lift weights. I am not unemotional, wear a hard outer shell, or buy a guy a drink so he will come home with me. I do not think about sex as often as men. I also love to talk about feelings… Problem.

2. If I do not have “feelings” for a guy, I definitely do not get jealous. I also do not care whether my guy friends are good looking or not because, let’s be honest, there are way more good looking girls in the world than men (at least in my world). No problems here.

3. I do not know the secret to successful friendship with a guy. Problem.

My strong eye contact is often misconstrued as me being sexually interested. However, often this is not the case and I am merely just engaged in the conversation. Also, my skillful ability to listen does not matter. And being empathetic probably doesn’t matter either because men are just staring at my mouth anyway.

Thus the major problem is sexual attraction. Men do not want to be my friend and would rather be in my bed- unless they are gay, <3!!

I have a few men in my life now that I would consider friends, but in all honesty, I would NOT trust being in a room alone with them… especially with some tequila involved. Men push the boundaries and enjoy instant gratification wherever possible, even if that means breaking a friendship.

As much as I wish I were wrong, life experience will vouch for me. I even used to believe that men with girlfriends or wives were trustworthy… NAIVE. I must be too sexy for my own good. Regardless, all is well because my true friends and goddesses are all the support and camaraderie that I need in order to take over the world.

xx,

Cleo

P.S. Stay tuned for details on my upcoming Singles Event this October =].

Tags: challenges, Flirting, Friendship, Life, Men, relationships, Singles, women