Cleo's Dating Blog

The Deficit in my Current Dating Life

Posted on: August 20, 2011

If you know me, then you know that I have zero issues in landing a suitor. A man who will buy me drinks and dinner can be found in most any nook of pleasure-driven Los Angeles. A man who would prefer to skip the courtship and head straight for the “dessert” is even easier to find.

Finding a man to have a solid conversation with (my favorite thing in the whole world) is harder to stumble upon, but oddly enough, not too difficult. However, in a world of actors and wannabe actors, it can get hard to tell who may be playing a character.

Overall, I try very hard to live in the moment. When I am on a date, out with friends, or alone in my room, I try to live in the now and not focus on my past or the tasks of tomorrow. With that said, I also try to make the absolute most out of every moment- the most fun, most contemplative, most interesting, most progressive, or most uplifting moment that I can create. I reach for exceptional. I don’t always succeed, but I try hard.

Whether first date, third date, boring man, immature boy, or Greek God, I do my best to have a great time no matter the circumstance. If I am going to be stuck somewhere, I am not going to waste it. I will laugh, even if it is just me making myself laugh. I will ask complex questions. I will flirt and test the boundaries of chemistry. I will drink. I will dine. I will learn something even if I have to dig for it. I will be myself.

Photo by Marie Buck

I accept that not every date or time spent with a man will be magical. In that sense, my dating life is fine. I meet new people, I have old contacts, I go on dates, and I have fun. The problem, for me, lies in the post-date moments.

It has been a VERY long time that the giddy, elated feelings of a date do not completely DIE by the time I get in my car to drive home, go to bed, and wake up the next morning. I feel blah the next day. When my spirit is not inline with another’s, I feel uneasy. If I know he is the kind of guy that wont call me, I feel uneasy. If I can tell he likes me a lot more than I like him, I feel uneasy. If I think he might be dating other women, I feel uneasy. If I sense that I am going to have to break off seeing someone, I feel uneasy. If the timing is off, if we do not openly communicate, if we do not understand each other, I feel uneasy. If I don’t think about him at all, well, I feel fine but it’s back to the drawing board.

Thus, the major deficit in my dating life is feeling good about the direction of my dates. I might as well be a [super cute] little mouse in maze that keeps hitting all the walls no matter what direction is tried. Where is the frickin cheese??

One of these days, I will feel good after the fact. Until then, chocolate and are a single girl’s best friend.







2 Responses to "The Deficit in my Current Dating Life"

Sounds like my dating life 6 years ago. I met people from two total opposite ends of the spectrum. Eventually I got over it and refused to go on another date!! Then, my husband fell into my lap. lol. Great post. Thanks for sharing. [following] Can’t wait to hear about your next adventure. :-)

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