Posts Tagged ‘self improvement’
The Perks to Having Secrets
Posted on: November 30, 2012
My favorite types of people have always been the ones that shock me. The more witty, insightful, wild, poetic, or vulgar you are… the more I probably like you. I possess an inherent dislike for all things boring. If you are not grabbing my attention, you are probably losing it. No wonder why I love the gays!
As with everything however, there must be a balance. Please do not shock me by how much you can talk, how rude you are, how bad you smell, or how many of my texts you can ignore. I tend to steer clear of the shockingly passive-aggressive or overly-argumentative people as well. I just want to have fun.
Even with all the ways in which you can get to know someone, it is still a challenge to deduce exactly what type of person a friend, lover, coworker, booty call, or neighbor may be. An individual may be fun and witty, but add two-faced and manipulative to the mix and I will put you in the trash pile. (Have you seen the TV show Hoarders? Bam! Here today, gone tomorrow).
We all go through phases and we all [are supposed to] grow up from time-to-time… Lord, do I know this! By no means do I expect perfection.
I am a person that likes to take career risks, love risks, and to embrace creative projects. I do not want to limit myself to a few skills or memories, I want many! As exciting as this is, it is almost just as fun to see how the people in my life respond.
When toying with an idea I am unsure of or debating whether or not to make a change in my life, there are definitely some people I can count on for endless support. There are others that will provide great perspective. There are some that will have virtually no input. However, it is always shocking to me to see who the negative, doubtful, and discouraging ones are.
This is when I decide that there are people I would rather just keep secrets from. I always feel obligated to be 100% honest when someone asks, “What’s new?” or, “How are things going?” I hate generic, one-word answers. BORING. I want to tell them exactly what is going in my mind, what new endeavors are happening, why I think I’m in love, and what my dream was about last night. Nonetheless, it is true that replacing my impulses responses with mundane answers such as, “Good, you?” are necessary at times.
This little open book is becoming more selective. Inclusion into the secret Cleo club is by invitation only.
I encourage you to be choosy in who you allow to participate in your inner life. Having secrets can be fun and can help keep you on track to happiness.
Sincerely Yours,
Cleo
They say that your 20’s is when you go through a lot of changes. Some get married and have children, others learn independence and strength through living alone. As a participant of the latter, I for one am pleased with my arrival at age 25.
When I think back to my early 20’s, I can vividly remember how frustrated I used to get when driving in traffic. Everyday I would literally picture myself with a sharp knife repeatedly stabbing someone in the chest (not that I would actually do it!). I hated everyone on the road and their stupid bumper stickers.
With age, I have learned some patience. I accept traffic as part of my life and remain calm as a result. I know to take the necessary precautions beforehand- have a snack, grab some coffee, pee before leaving- so that my frustration does not escalate to where I am no longer in control.
My friends now may not agree because they did not know the “college me”, but I have also (slowly) learned to limit my alcohol consumption. School was a time when I did not drink to be social, I drank to be wasted. Transitioning to a time in my life where that is no longer the norm has been a challenge. However, after the fiasco of my 25th birthday and the miserable day following, the need to be completely out of control has ran away with my dignity. Good thing I have the rest of my 20’s to find it!
Consequently, my slightly higher level of coherence has made me more aware of the beauty around me. When is the last time you appreciated the warmth of the sun on your face? Do you take an extra moment to fully enjoy a hug from a good friend?
I spent this past weekend in Santa Barbara and it was as though the beauty of life slapped me across the face. “Wake up and realize how gorgeous your life is!” she said. Boohoo if you’re single and you’re starting to get those tiny little veins on your legs from standing too much. Those are minuscule details compared to all of your other blessings.
It is easy to get caught up in schedules, budgeting, career paths, boyfriends, and weight management. Until you open your eyes and see how beautiful this frickin tree is…
You do not have to start being annoyingly optimistic, but curbing the complaining would not hurt either. The only secret to living is to enjoy the moment found within right now and using the senses that God gave you to be stimulated. Feel the wind, anxious butterflies, and crazy love.
Although a challenge everyday, I am taking life for what it is (gorgeous) and dating for what it is (kinda sucky), but being grateful that I am exactly where I am meant to be today. The future is still going to happen and I need not worry.
Speaking of today, Happy Halloween and I look forward to seeing all the slutty pictures on Facebook tomorrow.
Be safe and go easy on the sweets,
Cleo
One of my favorite past times is sweating. I love when I workout so hard that the sweat stings my eyes and drips into mouth and my shirt clings to my lower back like a sponge. This is purity in its highest form (second to abstinence, of course).
I have been cross-training and interval training for years. Intensity is a word that runs through my mind every time, whether or not I actually push to that level. What keeps me going when my body is hurting is the thought that I probably will not die, even though I feel like it.
Lately I have started to wonder, can your workout mentality leak into other areas of your life?
My theory is: yes.
Much like my exercise regimen, there are times that I tend to “go all out” in my love life and my work life. As if I only have 15 seconds left of spilt-squat jumps, I dig deep for that extra bit of patience, sweetness, ambition, discipline, compassion, or control until even my bones hurt. I ignore the pain and I keep plowing forward. I tell myself that I am not actually going to die.
Sometimes this is good. We all know that getting out of your comfort zone is the only way to accelerate growth.
However, sometimes this is bad. If we push too far past our limit we may sprain our ankle or dislocate our shoulder, in the emotional sense. This can be illustrated by the times when we try to make others jealous on purpose, get too drunk and make inappropriate phone calls, completely lose our sense of judgement, lash out in anger, get moody, get anxious and cry, stir the drama pot, or anything else that could get you casted on a Reality TV show.
Although I may be addicted to that climactic feeling when you finally reach the top of that steep hill in spin class, pushing this hard in your personal life is not sustainable. What is better is to remain consistent.
Taking steps toward your career goals or finding the love of your life is more similar to running a marathon than doing single-leg blurpies. Being ready and then giving up and then being ready and then giving up again is not healthy for any party involved. That is why going slow is always better. Give your endurance some time to build. Let things flow naturally like a pleasant dance and do less forcing.
September will be the month of casting my cares. Will you join me?
Namaste,
Cleo
The Pie of Beautiful
Posted on: August 21, 2012
I really like pumpkin pie and banana cream pie. I’m not too into apple pie or pecan pie.
Regardless, I am always sad when my dessert of choice is gone. The sweetness never lasts long enough! I am not ashamed of licking my plate.
Even sharing dessert can sometimes be challenging for me. It is a hard life that I lead.
Whether or not you share in the same struggle of mastering your sweet tooth as I do, we are all lucky that things like beauty and success do not come in pie form. Otherwise Ashton Kutcher and the Olsen Twins would rule the world.
Many people act like they do not realize this to be true. I find that I have fewer and fewer friends because so many girls get catty and judgmental and so many people in general would rather see you fail and struggle then succeed. As a newbie to the world of entrepreneurship, one of the rules of growth is to be careful with whom you share your ideas with. Haters bring negativity and no one taking a risk needs any extra doses of doubt.
Beautiful women are often harsh with other beautiful women because of competition. The fight for attention, perks, stature, or the feeling of self-worth fuel the seeds of jealousy and contempt. But let’s be honest ladies, it is not the other beautiful face that is making you look bad, it is your attitude.
The world would be a sweeter place if we could all remember that the best things in life are not limited by a pie sheet. There is a limitless amount of beauty, strength, charisma, and love to go around. I prefer to surround myself with the best of the best because it inspires me to be more tomorrow than what I am today. The narrow-minded can stay home.
If your thoughts are limited to a 12 inch circle, it is not too late to break free. When you do, you can join my club.
Yours Truly,
Cleo
How Organic Are You?
Posted on: June 20, 2012
I went to Whole Foods last night to get chicken noodle soup for my cute, little, sicky roommate. What was left was mostly broth so I played the damsel-in-distress card and asked them for a fresh batch. To my surprise, it comes pre-made! No wonder the recipe never took my breath away.
As I struggled to scoop the excessively long noodles out of the metal tin with a spoon (impossible!), my eyes gazed up and locked with Mr. Whole Foods Employee. Dark hair, dark eyes. Just how I like it! I could feel him focus on me from across the counter. Even though I was not sure why since I had wet hair and was wearing my least best outfit of the week and even though I am not typically attracted to the staff of grocery stores, I decided to ignore those thoughts and embrace the mutual energy.
Continuing to splash noodles all over myself, I turn to notice that dark-eyes has moved from the opposite end of the counter to the side closest to me. How ironic. As he helps an older woman wearing a fuchsia sweater, he strategically drops an empty sample cup right next to my foot. I smile, pick it up for him, and as our hands touch there was a spontaneous lightening storm inside the store. He says, “thank you” and I turn away.
Here comes the point when a decision must be made. Do I push through the initial moment of contact and progress to the next level or do I let it sweetly linger to be potentially continued later?
I went through a phase last year when I always pushed forward. I considered it “being brave”, and it was. I took risks and rushed moments. I tried to rapidly propel the growth of feelings and attraction.
Although a whirlwind of excitement, there is something to be said of interactions that progress organically. Taking one sweet moment at a time extends the life of each and we all know that these moments tend to be few and far between. The risk here is that a future encounter is not guaranteed.
Last night I chose organic. Small steps. Nothing may ever happen, but today my spirits are just slightly higher.
Often we try to create what we want out of something before it is ready. We lose some patience because we are all so anxious to get our hands around our dreams. I am totally guilty of this more times than I realize.
How organic are you? How much do you let life lead you?
Sometimes the best thing we can do is to just enjoy the ride.
Turns out that the most organic thing at Whole Foods is the staff.
Sincerely yours,
Cleo
Girl, You Need a Boyfriend
Posted on: June 16, 2012
People say this to me often.
“Why don’t you have a boyfriend?” What tends to follow is, “Just lower your standards a little.”
If I could lower my standards and be happy, don’t you think that I would just do it already? It’s not like I am trying to win a contest of who can stay single the longest. I would love to have someone that could watch movies with me and play with my hair.
For those of you that have known me for many years, you know that I have not always had high standards. I used to have lots of boyfriends because I would only look for a few, key qualities and ignore the rest. Usually if a guy was nice and treated me well, then that was enough.
My ability to ignore things has drastically decreased. I can no longer date men that play video games all day, drink themselves to a mushy physique, smell bad, have yellow teeth, embarrass themselves in public, cry a lot, dress like it’s still the 90’s, smoke a lot of “medicine”, have a different personality around friends, have small hands, do not like to cuddle, think driving really fast is cool, have a dry sense of humor, or have nothing interesting to say (these are all true).
I have lowered my standards before, but having the wrong boyfriend is worse than being single and lonely. When single, I spend my time thinking of ways to improve my life. Although occasionally rough for a person like me that loves companionship and the idea of love, at least I know I am improving. When I do not fully adore my boyfriend, my time is spent trying to convince myself that I am happy or that I have enough patience…or else I am thinking of the most strategic ways in which to end the relationship. Sad, I know.
I guess I am at that annoying stage in my life that middle-aged people always tell me to cherish. “I wish I had enjoyed my 20’s more!” Alright, but your 20’s kind of suck when you have no proven career, no authority in the workplace, no family, no money, no beach house, no swimming pool in your backyard, no nanny, and so many distractions. The opportunities are beautiful and boundless, but it is such a waiting game to see which ones will flourish and which ones will crash. One step at a time and hopefully 30 years from now I won’t regret anything major…
Chat soon,
Cleo
Do Not Binge and Purge Your Ego
Posted on: June 13, 2012
One of my best friends always supports me no matter what I do. If I want to drunk text, she supports me. If I want to eat a hamburger, she supports me while also participating. If I want a spray tan, she supports me. If I want to throw a singles mixer without any experience, she supports me. If I want to curl up in a ball and cry or if I want to dance on a pole, she supports me.
Much like cheesecake, if something yummy is in front of me, then I am going to eat it up until there is nothing left. I love support! My ego smiles.
I have other friends that tell it like it is (or as they see it). If it was socially acceptable, they would probably slap me across the face for all the times I let my emotions and fantasies of love get the better of me. They tell me when I am thinking too much, when I need to move on, when I say stupid things, or when my dress is too tight. They tell me when a guy is not into me when all I want to do is make excuses for him. These friends also play devil’s advocate on my business ideas and ask questions that make me sweat (hypothetically… girls don’t sweat).
These friends are the protein powder of my life. My ego does not crave or actively enjoy this treatment, but it is necessary for me to grow strong life, love, and dating muscles.
Most of my friends, however, just feel my pain and share in my joy. They are the staple, margarita pizza of my life.
Too much of one or too little of the other, and I would be a crazy mess… even more than I already am! The binge and purge method is not healthy. Having a well balanced support system and wide spectrum of opinions creates a good life diet. Cosmopolitan Magazine and horoscope compatibility charts do not have all the answers, as much as I love both strategies. However, if you are going to heavily rely on one source, Cleo is probably your best bet.
If you are open-minded to different ways of thinking and willing to adjust some of your old habits, then you may discover the ancient tradition of maturation.
Goddess Love,
Cleo
Hot or Not?
Posted on: March 5, 2012
I do not know what part of the world you live in, but here in Los Angeles (greenhouse of the superficial) many people tend to pride themselves on meaningless things.
The obvious ones for women are breast size, engagement ring size, purse size, and lip size while puckering in photographs.
The obvious ones for men are number of dollars, number of women, number of “VIP” connections, and number of pull-ups accomplished at one time.
What seems to be a popular competition among both genders is number of hours worked.
All of these annoy me.
It is one thing to possess any of these traits because they fit into your lifestyle and who you are. It is quite another to flaunt them and believe that they make you important or entitled to special treatment as a superior human being.
What is the common denominator of all these characteristics? They are all surface level measurements. What you see is what you get (sometimes what you get is even less than what is advertised).
I am not blindly attracted to the superficial, super-rich, super-ripped, super-ladies men of the world. The men I want to get to know are what the ancient Egyptians referred to as, “interesting.”
People with substance! People that surprise you by their intellect, values, wit, and personality. People that can teach you something that enriches your life. People that motivate you to become a better version of yourself. People that are fun to be around. People that are more than what they seem. (Of course, all of these things plus a hot physique is preferred.)
Ladies, is there anything more attractive than a hot and humble man? Or a financially stable man who is not flashy?
If all I did was work and talk about work, I would be afraid that people would notice that I am dull. Quite a few men I know that only work, drink beer, and repeat do not seem to notice that their lifestyle lacks any type of intrigue.
What does your daily life say about you? Are you obsessed with the way that you look yet completely neglect your inner self? There are so many meat heads in the world. What makes you different? Do you non-stop talk about your ex-relationships? Newsflash, no one will ever care as much as you do. Spare us some details.
The easiest way to tell if you are on Cleo’s Hot or Not list is by asking yourself these questions: Would you want to spend time with you? Is having a conversation with yourself fun and interesting? If you met someone just like you, would you think he/she is attractive?
If you are unsure of how to answer, then these are some things you could work on. Self improvement is an ongoing process! Do not just fill your life with meaningless things such as taking work home or going to a club. Become a person of interest and surround yourself with like-minded people.
Yours Truly,
Cleo
Cleo’s Valentine’s Day Orgy
Posted on: February 18, 2012
If you did not attend my Valentine’s Day event, the title totally makes you regret it, huh?!
One definition of the word, orgy, is: excessive indulgence in a specified activity. Although we did not have a sexual orgy, we definitely had a “mingling” orgy.
The night started out great for me when I had tacos for dinner. Thanks Jaz!
Then, arrival at the Redbury Hotel. I had never been to this SBE venue before, but I was pleased to find that it is next door to what used to be one of my favorite gay clubs, TigerHeat.
Proceeding through the entrance, I instantly liked the dim lighting (this time of the year is when my skin is most pale) and elegant ambiance (to help encourage me not to drink like it’s a frat party).
The event was held at the hotel’s Library Bar, which is located upstairs from Cleo Restaurant (ironic). Here, my lovely Cleo followers began to congregate around our designated, VIP-only table where the paparazzi could not find us.
We started as a small group of ultra-hot ladies sippin’ on pomegranate-champagne concoctions while indulging in chocolate treats, talking about sex, describing the men of our dreams, petting each other’s hair, and other unmentionables. Then, as more people began to arrive, the energy picked up and the real games began… details of which are reserved for event goers only, *wink*.
I am proud to say that most of the people at the event were Cleo-induced and definitely the hottest, most fun, and well-rounded of the event were part of the Cleo clan. Thus, my favorite aspect of the night was definitely the crowd. We cleaned up nicely, put a smile on, and seized the idea of creating new opportunities. For that, I am very pleased.
In addition to a great crowd and ambiance, the venue also provided us with some creative and delicious cocktails and food. My favorite was the spicy, It’s Not Me, It’s You, cocktail pictured below.
However, as much as numbers and crowds are a major part of the social life business, I am definitely a quality over quantity type of gal. That being said, I want to raise to the surface the concept of Attendance vs. Presence.
Despite the radiant Cleo girls and boys at the event, some could not have been more disappointing. Why would you go to a singles event to slouch in the corner with a frown on your face and expect someone to come up to you and change your life? If this is you and you are not satisfied with the status of your dating or love life, I think I know why. If all you are willing to do is wait for something to happen, you may as well just stay home and watch Love Actually alone. Cleo events are for the fiery, go-getters of the world. In the survival of the fittest world of dating, attendance is not enough. How much presence do you have?
Stepping down from my soap box, I want to extend a huge THANK YOU to everyone that did come and show your support for love, Valentine’s Day, and Cleo (and everyone that wanted to). Cheers to us!
To view a complete list of all the best photos and to stay current with upcoming events, please click here or check out Cleo’s Facebook Page.
Thanks again and I wish you all the best! To quote Kelly Clarkson, “It doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone.”
xx,
Cleo
RIP whitney houston <3
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